exhausted

Mentally Exhausted

First day of february

2014

8.19pm

Some days are tough

Some days are easy

Today is a tough one

I feel like I don’t have enough energy left to care for her

I feel like I’m ready to give up

I feel like I have no clue what to do

I feel like I don’t have enough support

I feel like crying

I want to take care of her

God knows I want to take care of her

If only..

If only she’s a normal human being

If only she can express her feelings like a normal person

If only life had not been so tough on her

Then.. maybe I can make her happy

But right now

I’m thinking that I could never make her happy

She keeps demanding more

She keeps living in her own world

She keeps driving me crazy

Some days are tough

She yells at me.. screaming.. screaming.. screaming nonsense

Some days are easy

She acts like everything is normal

Today is a tough one

Today, I’m wishing I don’t have to carry this burden

Today, I’m thinking how to get rid of this burden

Today,..

I’m a really really bad person

....

Dear God, please give me the strength to face the things that I cannot change

...